ONE WEEK IN!!I

It's been a week, how has that happened??!!  Some things seem so fast and other seem so slow.  I hope everybody had a fabulous easter!  My kids had a blast, and we had mom over for a bit for breakfast - it looked good.  It was kind of hard for me because I'm still not allowed to eat, so I just had to watch and smell the goodness, but I know this will be worth it.  I had a couple of major accomplishments this week (well, they were major for me at least) - I wore my jeans for an hour yesterday morning.  I have been in stretchy pj bottoms for over a week, which drives me nuts.  Don't get me wrong, I love pjs and all, but not go to into public and a week is a little much at once lol; but, because of the swelling and the incisions I can't have anything that isn't over sized on - it hurts and makes me sick.  I did make it an hour though, I was rather excited.  Then, last night, I slept laying down.  I haven't been able to lay down because it pulls on my stomach, but I finally was able to do it last night and sleep.  It was a big deal for me.  Some times I feel like everything is moving so slowly.  I miss work.  I still can't eat.  I miss clothes.  I can't even drink water like I'm used to, I have to do it in small ounces over periods of time, which will drive you insane, trust me.  I tried for a year to get to this point.  Classes, doctors appointments, tests, it was crazy.  This is what happens when you decide to go through this process:  You have to research bariatric surgeons in your area - in Pueblo that means in you state because there aren't any here.  Then you need to research everything about them, insurance taken, degrees, certifications, success rates, any failures, law suits - before you walk in the door you will know about your doctor than you do almost anybody else in your life, I promise.  Then you set up the initial appointment which can be several months away.  At your first appointment, all of your self conscious parts will be on display, but you need to get used to it because it will stay that way for longer than you can imagine.  You will be weighed, they will measure your neck, waist, arms, bmi, blood pressure, heart rate, if it is measurable they will measure it - and probably take pictures of it.  You will meet with the initial nutritionist, a food consultant, a psychologist, a nurse, and finally the doctor.  They will go through everything they want you to do to prepare to submit to the insurance, and a list of things they want you to do to be prepared for surgery.  This usually includes monthly doctors appoints to monitor your weight and exercise habits, you have to meet with nutritionists regularly including keeping an accurate food diary, I had to have two sleep studies, and upper gi, a lower gi, an endoscopy, cardiac stress test, and get psychiatric clearance because of my PTSD - and that was before we even went to insurance.  We were just about to submit to insurance when the surgeon I had chosen left the practice - I was sent a letter letting me know.  Can you imagine??  I had gone through all of that, I trusted my surgeon and his staff, I was ready and mentally prepared to have the surgery, then bam back at square one.  I went back to my research and found a surgeon actually closer to home, it took me about six weeks to pick one, and then it took almost three months to get in to him.  I was ready for another long battery of tests and frustrations.  More hoops to jump through.  I met my surgeon exactly six weeks ago.  Yes, six weeks.  The day I met him he had already gone through my flies and records and he was ready to operate.  After all of my waiting I had a date, and it was extremely close.  The five weeks leading up to the surgery seemed to fly by.  Building up to this type of surgery causes so many emotions, fear, regret, indecision, excitement.  Everything runs around and jumbles up and there are times you can't think of everybody else.  Thank god for the support group that I have around me.  Without Christi, Pam, Joe, Sheri, Susan, Joee, John, Beth, Karen, Melli - and that's just the first few - I couldn't have gone through with this, and I am where I am today because of them and their support.  That is so important, words can't describe.  The people I named, those of you that are reading this, and so many more have given me the confidence, the strength, to know that I can do this even if the struggles are hard.  This will be another week of big things.  I will be attempting some solid food this week, I am going to to gym on Friday, and next Monday is my post op appointment - first weigh in since surgery :)  I will write again in the next couple of days.  I am loving the reaction to my blog - thank you everybody for sharing it with me, and share it with your friends too, lets see how many people we can reach.  Obesity is an epidemic in this country, and far too many people aren't talking about it, and that doesn't help it only makes it worse.  Thank you again!!!  I love you all